Five inspirational encounters of the REAL human kind

Now, the case of A, back in 2004. Actually there was no way I could sensibly have got involved with him, because he was a local (i.e., Exeter) rough sleeper who understood nothing of self-actualization, and was on and off heroin and presumably other drug dependencies, and also with some violence in his makeup (I guess probably he'd had abusive parents) — and of course he was in with a whole pile of seriously harmful company — though there was also a certain endearing gentleness and almost tenderness about him too*.

What was particularly striking about him was that every time I saw him either in the street (selling The Big Issue magazine) or in my mind's eye, he felt to me to be fundamentally, potentially an 'ultimate' friend / companion / bedmate — as though he had exactly the same 'energy' make-up and depth of awareness as I had (something I'd never experienced before except as something that I always longed for). I'd get exceptionally, tiresomely, sexually aroused each time, with a strong craving for his company even though I was clear that it was completely unworkable to have anything to do with him. — And that was in spite of the quite strong rather hostile-seeming 'push energy' I always felt about him.

Although I haven't seen him for many years, just to think of him still evokes that sense of craving for him, with strong sexual arousal, and I have a sense of ongoing connection with him as though he were a lifelong very close friend.

What I understand about him now is that, as well as having no soul, he had a particular 'specialist' configuration aimed at having a support role for 'sniff-it-out' no-soul people, of which latter I myself am one, in being a close friend / companion.

The reason for this configuration type existing is allegedly because deeper consciousness recognised that there were so many obstacles to 'sniff-it-out' people coming together as close friends because of their strong independent-mindedness and self-reliance, that it made sense to give them an additional and possibly more accessible opportunity for at least similar-level companionship — i.e., once the 'sniff-it-out' primary task had been completed and 'specialist' no-soulers were being encouraged to come together and at last find fully meaningful companionship.

In later (mid-May 2022) re-examination of what was going on between me and A, I find this to be a touching illustration of the love intrinsic in consciousness, right through from the deepest levels. At least, I myself am deeply touched in my recognition of what was going on. A came to my notice, having an electrifying effect on me, about the time my hilariously hideous and at times potentially life-threatening troubles from the garbage started in earnest (see The 'forces of darkness' ('astral beings') — My own tough experiences.

Unknown to my 'ordinary mind', those troubles were showing clearly in my developmental trajectory from a quite early stage in my life, and deeper consciousness tweaked the trajectory of A to intersect with mine at an early stage in my big troubles, when I'd be having a hideous time of it, and that hideous time would make my lack of any close connection with anyone an agonizing burden to bear. Deeper consciousness did that for me in pretty good confidence that at that stage in my life I had the strength of focus not to get at least significantly involved with him at the physical level.

I did sometimes actively go out of my way when out shopping, to have the occasional brief chat with him. I was feeling almost desperate to have him in my arms and indeed in bed with me, but knew the unworkability of such involvement with him and all his own issues — and indeed of allowing myself to be driven by such feelings in any circumstances at all. I was aware of a general life purpose of mine, to work in some way towards bringing more rational and human behaviour into the world, even though I had nothing like the clarity and insight I have now on the matter, so was determined not to let 'affairs' or 'romance' of any sort stand in the way of that.

However, each time I had one of those little chats with him my deeper aspects were working away to ensure that I unawarely established, and then each further time reinforced, not only a proper deep-level no-soul companionship connection with him (truly a close friend for life), but also a mental image of him as he would be without all those issues of his. I then effectively had healthy focus for my periodic solo 'lovemaking' sessions at night, so as not to suffer the harm from either abstinence or crude masturbation without real human connection. That real deep connection with him, and the surrogate mental image of him still remain with me, though now getting quite sidelined by new developments.

At the time of my troubles, however, my connection with him was a figurative lifeline to me in helping keep my morale up during the ongoing stresses and periodic more or less dangerous excesses of those times, and gave me some sense of a powerfully inspiring friend in my arms while I had the occasional solo 'lovemaking' sessions. — Not that he was my only sanity saver, however, because:

• even through the most difficult periods I still forced myself to go out on full-length (up to 21 miles) strenuous hikes, even on far Cornwall coast path, hitch-hiking to get to and from the hiking route, and

• as I'd already become enlightened (in 1997), I had a rare advantage, in having the ability to be proactively peaceful observer of even the most difficult experiences, and not to get attached to any of the supposedly alluring scenarios and out-of-this-world 'soul mates' that I was incessantly being informed were just round the corner for me, or get damaged by the severe attacks that were kindly given me as part of various attempts to destroy me.

As for A himself, his own deepest aspects had used our encounters to provide him with a similar deep connection with me, of which he was most likely superficially unaware, but which considerably lightened the stress he was enduring because of his being unable to connect with anyone really meaningful to him.

His inability to connect properly with anyone was made more tormenting because of his 'specialist' configuration, which meant that he had a very strongly supportive and comforting type of energy, and use of that (i.e., through healthy connection with an appropriate 'specialist' no-souler, and especially a 'sniff-it-out' one) would be the real fulfilment of the 'relationship' aspect of his life experience, which latter as I say, was blighted by his inability to connect.

According to my current inner inquiry, it was that connection with me as a fellow 'specialist' no-souler that gave him the extra bit of inner strength to get fully off heroin and wean himself more or less off the whole rough-sleeping arena and actually find a female partner and have a family.

I did see them fleetingly once in the street. It looked to me like a pretty low-grade existence, in which he looked awkward and out-of-place, and the violence aspect from his childhood may well have given the children a hard time, but at least he'd found some semblance of stability away from the rough-sleeping and drugs scene. A check now of his and my developmental trajectory shows no further signs of meaningful encounters with him in the remainder of this lifetime.

…And now, let's fast-forward to much happier and obviously fulfilling times, starting in 2021…

My leg muscles were flagging after the Pentargon valley, but I kept going gently, thinking I'd take the very first escape route once I'd got up to the top of the Fire Beacon Point high ground. However, once I'd toiled my way up there, to my consternation there seemed no longer to be an obvious way through, without battling through routes that were now blocked off. Because of my leg muscle stress I didn't want to give them a lot of additional stress negotiating barriers and possibly getting a severe bout of cramp.

So, on and on I walked along the coast path, still finding that the odd escape route that I'd previously noticed was now blocked off and displayed the odd 'PRIVATE' notice here and there. Fortunately the walking then was easy-going, most of it on pasture land just back from the clifftop, and the undulations were gentle, with an overall gradual ascent towards the top of the Rusey Cliff headland. I kept to a very gentle pace, and my legs were managing that without significant complaint, though fatigue was gradually building up, and time running out, and this was mid-week, and I'd not seen anyone at all for nearly an hour.

It would have been nice to continue towards Crackington Haven, but I knew there was a National Trust owned good track from that high point leading to a bridleway, which would take me soon to the road, so I aimed for that, and eventually came out on that bridleway, and paused to take stock with my map.

I was well aware that I was taking quite a chance coming out there, because it was gone 6.0 p.m., and I was still well removed from any main road, and when I got to the minor road I'd be hitch-hiking back to Exeter, with very little traffic on that road, and without any nice through route towards Launceston or Exeter. — It's an adventure!, I silently reminded myself with a grimaced smile reflecting a joyful nervousness.

While I was checking the map to make sure which way to direct myself when I got to the road, a runner (quite resplendent-looking and darkish-skinned but not what I'd call black) came down, and stopped by me, asking if I was all right and needed any assistance. That was a rarity — a runner who actually stops for anyone. In my experience the vast majority of runners are so fixated on their running that they ignore everyone. But this one had not only stopped for me but was showing real human concern.

I averted my gaze from him a bit to quell a slight pang of erotic feeling, for he looked really great and I'd love to have him in my arms right there and then, and explained that I should be okay, and was just checking to ensure I pointed myself the right way for my return hitch-hike to Exeter — the immediate target probably being the not-far-off Tresparrett Posts crossroads, where there would be a little bit more traffic.

The dear fellow (I think his name was D) offered to drive me to a spot that was reasonably secure for me to get picked up. At first I didn't want him to go to that trouble, and said it really was okay, and all part of the adventure, but we got talking a little anyway, and I was starting to tune into him, and felt drawn to him, feeling I wanted to be close to him (I mean now not the superficial thing of his physical good looks, but something deeper), and he was clearly getting more interested in me.

As I was about to move on, he repeated his offer, emphasizing that it would be no trouble, and he'd really like to do that for me, so I accepted his offer, and we walked up to his car at the top. In the short conversation with him I gave him one of my cards and he got interested in my Clarity of Being site, and I told him about his having no soul, and thus there being a strong affinity between us.

I also lamely said the real way for us to part would be with a hug, but I was still taking anti-covid precautions (indeed I was wearing face mask in the car) and so would keep it to elbow bumps this time. He said he'd be very amenable to a hug, so I was feeling a little silly and frustrated when I 'religiously' did the final elbow bump, by then feeling this guy to be a really delightful close friend, but was wearily resigned to turning my back on anyone who I really wanted as a friend / companion. He dropped me at the Marshgate turning on the A39, and then I had a surprisingly good remainder of that journey.

As though in answer to my frustration at not having had a hug with that wonderful guy who gave me the first return lift on Wed., my final outward lift this time (from Kennard's House junction, just past Launceston) was with a youngish guy (J) who resembled the former guy to a bewildering extent, even to the extent of somewhat dark skin colour, and had extremely similar (beautiful) energy, and who quickly got really interested / excited about my music and my Clarity of Being site.

He was a sort of mental health worker, but freelancing, and doing what he could to assist people with special needs – including people with the various types of supposed autism. – And this time neither he nor I had any doubt about parting with a delightful long hug!

The return lift was with L, a youngish no-soul man, who was going to drop me at Whiddon Down, but he got very interested in my Clarity of Being work and my unique Fix the Human Condition project, and then wanted to take me into Exeter so we could talk for longer.

There turned out to be a quite disconcerting congruity in our outlooks and thinking, which suggested a similar, outstanding, level of mental clarity, and, strikingly, that very word 'congruity' kept flashing up in the back of my mindspace. I established that he was no-soul, and told him about that — which he appeared to understand almost instantly. At my suggestion, we had a parting hug, and for me that was not just a ‘wow’ experience, but it felt mighty strange, as though his whole ‘energy’ were calling out “Congruity! Look, congruity!”.

As I walked back to base I realized that the 'congruity' message was not so much anything coming specifically from him, but it was my own deepest aspects drawing my attention to something important about him. Allegedly he’s a member of another incarnational thread that is specially configured the way mine is, for the purpose of fixing the ‘human condition’. He said he wanted to get in touch soon to talk over my methodology and project, and I offered him an introductory Alexander Technique lesson.

That return lift was with J2, a no-souler who was actually returning from work to his home in nearby Chagford, and had passed me by, but came back, and was insistent that he'd take me to where I wanted to go, even though it would mean going right out of his way. He said he'd seen me hitch-hiking several times before, and each time had felt that he wanted to pick me up, but had been in a company van and so hadn't been able to do so.

This felt surreal, because superficially he looked to be a quite unprepossessing character, his face / ears disfigured with body piercing and small metal rings put in — something I generally associate with a fair amount of violence and unawareness in the person’s makeup, if not actual criminality. He was sure giving me rather a thrilling ‘buzz’, but I thought probably that would be for an unhelpful reason (one of those tiresome sexual fetish effects caused by those mutilations).

Yet he was surprising me. He got really interested when I gave him one of my cards, and mentioned about Project Fix the Human Condition, and told him he was apparently a no-soul person himself. Nearing destination, I suggested that if he wasn’t averse to the idea, he get out of the car when I did, and we have a real and ‘meant’ hug to enjoy the experience of a real no-souler hug, and he clearly relished the idea. It turned out to be another real ‘pinnacle’ hug (to call the beauty of it 'rapturous' seems horribly prosaic!), also underlining for me that he really was no-soul.

It came to mind then for me to comment that the chances were that he had spinal / skeletal weaknesses – and, I think rather amazed, he acknowledged that he was aware of some, and was duly interested when I mentioned the Alexander Technique intro on my Clarity of Being site.

Despite the ‘violence’ signals given out by his body mutilations, he came across as a gentle, intelligent guy who I’d love to be an ongoing friend of mine.

We got talking, and what really got things going was my announcing to him that, like me, he had no soul.

Wow! was his amused and measured but really meaningful response, much underlining my indications about him, and he got much more interested. That simple monosyllable and its mode of delivery communicated much to me, and in particular a great mental clarity and lack of attachment.

Then, after some more talking, eventually he was about to move on, and we initially shook hands, but then I said the real way for us to part would be with a warm and joyful hug — at which he burst out laughing because, he said, he’d been not quite daring to suggest that very thing himself!

So, packs hurriedly taken off, we had a laughing, rapturously beautiful hug, which felt all in a league of its own in its magnificence, with a sense of a great wind of pure fresh air blowing reciprocally between us, silently exclaiming At last! At last!.

Then we got talking just a bit more, and we’d both got our packs on again, and we were laughingly and laughably doing our best to have another hug like that before finally parting. You'd no doubt have joined in the laughter then if you'd seen us at that point — vainly trying to get our arms around each other with those confounded big packs bang in the way!

It was clear that he didn’t want to part with me any more than I wanted to part with him, including the physical closeness. I’ve never had such a strong and mutually loving interaction with anyone before, without the slightest hint of 'coloration' or agenda of any sort.

A bit frustratingly, once he’d gone I thought to check on whether that unprecedented level of interaction reflected his having a special configuration as I do. My indication for that was that indeed, he's another of the ‘sniff-it-out’ no-soulers, and, what’s more, my inner inquiry indications were ‘strengthening’ for the two of us to get together* to share projects and be open and supportive to each other at all levels. Indeed, I'd also picked up from his own deepest aspects that it would be by far the most beneficial choice for him too.

He’d talked of wanting to contact me after his multi-day SW Coast Path trek, but had expressed some diffidence as to whether he’d know what to say in any communication, so it could be that his own lack of self-confidence about that (or indeed really his own strong self-reliance pattern making excuses for continuing our respective isolated existences) could make him hold back. If only I’d known then that he was a ‘sniff-it-outer’, and that there really was strong reason for us to come together a lot as both fellow project workers and close friends on the most deeply human level!

Also I could have offered him a workshop cum Alexander Technique lesson and some Helpfulness Testing and self-empowerment training to start things off, but didn’t think of all that till too late. At least he did have my card, so could get in touch once he was back at home, if indeed his motivation wasn't to get obstructed by his uncertainties or independence / self-reliance pattern…

The longer wait and my refused lift offers were all made worthwhile by the guy who did offer a usable lift. His name was H, and although he was nearly rather than fully no-soul, I got an immediate impression of a great and immensely genuine and beautiful love about him, and it felt shiver-up-the-spine beautiful sitting right beside him and having our conversation and being very open between us about various issues. He was greatly interested in my take on self-actualization and the matter of no-soul people coming together.

A bit in advance, I suggested that when I dropped off at Alphington Junction, he also get out of the car so we could have a proper hug. In the event, that was exquisitely beautiful and lengthy, with a real ‘epic’ reciprocity feel about it — even though the ‘energy’ of it not having quite the same depth and magnitude of ‘epic’ quality as with my mind-blowing embrace with W last Saturday.